How do I get past this? When did I lose my pride, my sense of self who I am. I guess the thought should be who am I. What do I want or even what's next.
All I can manage to think is why aren't I enough for him. After 14 years all I feel is that I'm not enough for him. I hate this feeling. I don't remember ever being this girl before. Where did my strength go. When did I become nothing to him.
I don't meet his needs, his wants, So why is he here. Why does he say he wants me. That I'm enough for him when I'm clearly not.
Why do I care? Why does it matter so much? Why can't I just be ok anymore. How long before I either forget or I work up the strength to talk or to leave him.
I'm not ready to ask questions cause I know I'm not ready for the answers. The truth is something I'm not ready to face. I don't know if it will end the life I thought we were working towards. All I know is I still want this life and even with that thought I don't know if I can feel this way much longer..
No comments:
Post a Comment